Frantically texting your best friend during the Fourth of...

Conversation

1. Jess it started uploading—public in 60 seconds.
2. What video are you seeing, which account?
3. Your roast — the one where you expose what happened with Mark.
4. I didn't press publish, it's saved as a draft, I promise.
5. I'm at the podium doing the Fourth toast, I can't leave.
6. Stop the toast, run backstage, unplug Wi‑Fi, anything.
7. Everyone is clapping for fireworks, my grandma's watching me.
8. Who else knows about this besides me and Mark?
9. Only you, Mark, and the person we told in college.
10. I would never purposely roast you at your family's event.
11. It shows my full name in the caption, it's tagging me.
12. Don't open that preview yet.
13. Screen says 'processing' and it started from your channel.
14. That's impossible, I scheduled a roast ages ago, not now.